Shower Part I: Minnesota

My first baby shower took place in Minnesota on Saturday, July 14. Thrown by my sister, a mix of family and friends gathered outside Sarah's Minnetonka home. Decorated in navy and coral, in honor of the colors chosen for our future baby room, the shower started off with a yogurt parfait bar, sausage egg bake, and cupcakes.

Following brunch, we played "Guess What's in the Bag." Ten sealed white paper bags were each filled with a single baby item. Guests had to feel the outside of the bag and guess what baby item was inside. There were two winners; both guessed all 10 items correctly. I only got four right. Embarrassingly, I guessed one if the items was a lollipop. Not only was I way off (the actual item was a thermometer), but lollipop's don't exactly belong in the baby category. Clearly I am not a mother yet.

Sarah also put together a quiz about my pregnancy. For those who were following my blog, they had an advantage. 

Finally, it was present opening time!

My old baby clothes and pictures with me in them

All set for Pietrini family vacation!

Thank you sister for such an amazing shower! Not even the heat could keep everyone from having a good time. 

Doctors, Doctors, & More Doctors

In the last two weeks, I have seen my speech therapist, neurologist, primary care doctor and OB, plus a high risk pregnancy doctor, and hematologist (resent blood test results found me low in Proteins S & C, which help prevent blood clots). So if you have any questions about medical insurance and obtaining a referral, I am your gal.

At the recommendation of my OB, I had a consultation with a high risk pregnancy doctor to discuss whether I am really "high risk". In describing my experiences with the difficulty breathing/VCD/acid reflux, which has basically dwindled to being non-existent, and my TIA-like experience, plus review of my bloodwork, the doc had good news for me: I'm not considered high risk. In fact, the doctor isn't convinced I actually had a TIA. And while Protein S & C are lower than expected, even for a pregnant woman, the doctor wouldn't actually describe me as deficient. The hematologist said the same.

In any case, all doctors involved agree that I should be put on Lovonox, a blood thinner, as a precautionary measure. I now have the pleasure of giving myself daily injections in the side of my stomach. In two weeks, I will switch to a different blood thinner injection, Heparin. The trade off for the double pokes is the option for an epidural. (I'm not as tough as I would like to think.)  

The craziness of appointments will continue. In two days I have an appointment for a venous Doppler ultrasound of the legs to make sure I am clear of blood clots and next week I'll be getting my blood drawn to ensure my platelet count hasn't decreased due to the Lovonox injections. That's not to mention my OB appointments that have just increased to weekly. 

I'm hoping this is my last medical update of this sort. I have several baby showers to catch you up on and one more this coming weekend!
   

Emergency Room Take Two

I had a TIA. Or at least that is what two neurologists have concluded. 

Towards the end of the work day on Friday, July 6, I started to feel some numbness on the right side of my face and in my right hand. I dismissed this at first, until I received a phone call. As I attempted to formulate words over the phone in response to the questions I was being asked, they were not the same words I was thinking. And I began stuttering. I knew what I wanted to say, but I was experiencing aphasia. Something was very wrong.
  
After I managed to get through the phone call, and explain to two of my coworkers what was happening, one of them called my OB's office. "Go to the emergency room." And to the emergency room (again) I went. 

Sparing you the details of my near refusal to get an MRI ("Lay down, hold still, use these ear plugs for the noise, and sorry if you're claustrophobic." Yeah right.), extraction of vials and vials of blood, an ultrasound on my throat, attempting to sleep with a compression machine on my calf's and being admitted overnight for observation, I now have not one, but two incidents in pregnancy never before seen by my OB. 

So now on top of my more frequent prenatal visits and speech therapy appointments, I had a follow up visit with a neurologist and later will be meeting with a high risk pregnancy doctor. With the neurologist, I went over in detail what happened to me two Fridays ago. Ruling out a migraine and observing some small abnormalities in my tests, some of which may only be appearing due to pregnancy, I was told this has to be ruled a TIA. Indefinitely, it's Baby Aspirin for life. Following pregnancy, I will have a repeat of tests, plus a transesophageal echo to find my real susceptibility to a full-fledged stroke.

Oh me and pregnancy.

Bonus: Because of what happened, by OB sent me in on Monday for a growth update ultrasound. Baby P weighed a perfect 4lb 8oz (52nd percentile). I was told to expect a healthy babe in the high sevens low eights.

Into the 4th Quarter

I'm now just about 31 weeks and it's really starting to hit me that this baby is going to be here before I know it! The doctor asked me the other day if we're ready and I had to turn to Seth for assurance. I didn't know how to answer because we don't have much of what we'll need (first shower is July 14 in Minnesota), the crib isn't even set up yet, and I'm not sure exactly what ready is supposed to feel like. But am I ready for her to be here instead of in my stomach? Well...yes! 

It has been exciting to really feel Baby P move around and this past week, I was even able to feel a case of the hiccups. She now isn't just giving me jabs here and there, but Seth and I can watch her as she moves across my belly and we can can feel when she sticks her butt and feet out (or what we think are her butt and feet). Pregnancy is just crazy!

Last week I finally saw the speech therapist for the first time. I am the first case my therapist has had in which nighttime triggers VCD. Typically VCD is exercise induced, so breathing and relaxation exercises were all she could really leave me with (as expected), in addition to the suggestion that VCD may actually be triggered by acid reflux, and that is what is causing nighttime breathlessness. So now I'm taking medication for acid reflux in case that's what is happening. I think it's a mystery that may never solved, but I am confident that this is pregnancy related and won't continue postpartum. Thankfully nights of little sleep from difficulty breathing are basically under control. My new challenge is getting comfortable and waking up each time I want to roll over. But I'll gladly take this common pregnancy bother over breathless awakedness - it only takes a few seconds to fall right back asleep.

Some other updates...

Recent Cravings: Watermelon, Caribou Coffee Decalf Vanilla Cooler, kettle chips, brie and sandwiches

Weight Gain: 23 pounds

Baby's Facing: Down (but still plenty of time to be doing some flips)

Belly Button: Still an innie! And thankfully no stretch marks and only the faintest of faint linea nigra.

Exercise: Mostly the elliptical, some weights and jumping in on Seth's P90X and  Insanity workouts (completely modified). You would think Seth should put on some sympathy weight! Instead, he's sees this time as an opportunity to get in shape while he can. 

Annoyances: The heat! 100 degree weather, come on! Painful calf cramps at night and getting emotional out of nowhere 

Name: Still undecided (my number one is Seth's number two and vise versa)

Lately

I realize that is has been a few weeks since I have written, mostly because there isn't much to update. I still haven't had my first appointment with a speech therapist since I'm still waiting for a referral to go through from my primary doctor. Thankfully in this time, however, I was able to enjoy six straight nights of awesome sleep while vacationing in South Carolina with the Pietrini family. I was hopeful that this was signifying the end of my battle, but by my second night back in Palatine, I am back to struggling nights. I guess I can only conclude that vacation is my cure.

As for the little babe, she continues to remind me of her presence. While slowing movement for a short period of time last week, she has amped her kicks and flips up these past few days. The Little Pea is also taking up more residency. As a result I find that I get full quickly; a bit of a bummer (although probably for the best) when trying to enjoy as much good southern food as possible on vacation.

Here are some pics from the trip.

The Kids

The Parents

Sweet gift from Uncle Gene & Aunt Blair

Our Happy Place

Paddle Boarding in My Third Trimester

The Fam, Sans Chris

Sweet South Carolina

In the last few weeks I have also been working on a little piece for the baby's (or lack there of) room. I am part of a monthly Pinterest-inspired party group with my coworkers and this month's project was painting on canvas. So, I settled on the following color scheme and got to work. 

Needs some touching up but just about the finished product. 

Diagnosis: I Need to See a Speech Therapist

The last several weeks have been tough and each night is a battle. A pattern has developed - I find myself up for the first time in the night just an hour after initially falling asleep. Depending on the extent of my breathlessness, I would be up for anywhere from a few minutes to three hours, often multiple times a night, taking walks outside (yes, Seth would get up with me), watching TV, reading, getting fresh air outside on the balcony, etc.  For whatever reason, the morning hours get better and I can typically sleep from 4 AM on with no disturbance.

This past week, a referral to a lung specialist went through from my OB and I made my appointment immediately. At the first visit, the doctor expressed concern as it is not normal for someone pregnant or with anxiety to actually wake themselves out of sleep. So he ordered me to get an echocardiogram (basically an ultrasound of my heart) and various tests on my blood to check if this was an issue with my thyroid or a case of anemia. While I prayed nothing was serious, I also prayed the doctor would find something so I would have a chance at a remedy.

The tests all came back normal, and the doctor was somewhat dumbfounded. Before completely dismissing me from my follow-up appointment, the doctor had a breathing test done (normal) and ordered an endoscopy. (They stuck a camara down my nose! Ugh.) Immediately during the endoscopy the doctor detected the problem: Vocal Cord Dysfunction. What? 

Vocal Cord Dysfunction, often misdiagnosed as asthma, basically causes airflow obstruction, partially or fully closing the vocal cords and resulting in shortness of breath. Treatment: see a speech therapist. No, I won't need to learn how to correctly pronounce my r's; I'll learn breathing exercises and techniques to eliminate abnormal vocal cord movement to increase airflow.

In an answer to prayer, it's definitely something, but not serious. I hope to get into therapy soon, as simply knowing the diagnosis and practicing some exercises I learned on the Internet have not eliminated my sleepless nights.

My wonder through all of this has been what the Lord's purposes are. I definitely have learned (well, actually already knew), that I have the best husband in the world. Seth has been up for hours in the night, sacrificing his own sleep and being the support I need. He told me: "You are not just going through this, we are." As we approach our fourth anniversary on June 7, I am thankful I married a man who takes his vows seriously.

I have prayed like I never have before in these last weeks, often wondering how long this will continue. Because some nights, I feel like I just can't go on (nearly every night) like this. I'm only 26 weeks, and I don't know if delivery, or my new found hope for therapy relief, will cure me.

But in the end, if this is a result of pregnancy, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I know I am so blessed to be pregnant and now more than ever, I can't wait to meet our baby girl.

Panic

It hit me at 1:00 AM on Sunday morning. Mother's Day. I woke up to nothing in particular, but one thing was certain, I felt like I couldn't fully breath. Like each breath didn't nearly satisfy. And I began to panic.

Before I let myself get too worked up I made my way to the bathroom. That's typically what I do when I wake up in the middle of the night, although this time it wasn't the reason. But I felt suffocated by the darkness; the dizziness the light caused when I turned it on made it no better. By the time I was back to the bedroom I was in tears. And pacing. And woke up Seth in the meantime.

"Do we need to go to the emergency room?" I didn't know what else to do so I mindlessly began putting on my  clothes. I knew this wasn't about to go away anytime soon. What good was it to sit around, or pace around, while I waited it out or should there actually be something seriously the matter. 

We rushed upstairs and I opened the door to my parents bedroom. (We were in Minnesota that weekend celebrating my niece's first birthday.) "What's the matter!" exclaimed by dad. I had never seen him wake up and jump out of bed so panicked. My mom met us outside their room and all agreed I should be taken to the hospital. "Does everything seem okay with the baby?" my mom asked. The baby. The baby! Everything below the lungs felt fine, although I hadn't felt her since I woke up.

Seth pulled up directions to North Memorial Hospital, my birth place, on his iPad. My dad said a quick prayer over us and we dashed out the door. Few words were exchanged in the car except those I used to try to explain what was going on. I was thankful to have Seth. My protector. And while I sensed his deep concern, he knew what needed to be done and rolled though several stop signs and a red light or two to do so.

There was no waiting when I arrived. The pregnant nurse behind the counter immediately brought me to the adjacent room where she took my blood pressure and fashioned me with identification bracelets. In the patient room, the ER doctor, husband to an OB, and nurse number two, also pregnant, began asking me questions about what was going on. Both were extremely sympathetic. I explained the shortness of breath and acknowledged my response may be nothing more than a panic attack/anxiety. Because when you feel like you can't breath, apprehension ensues. 

The doctor explained this may be exactly what it is. As my pregnancy progresses, additional pressure is put on my lungs. Couple that with pregnancy hormones and my reaction is not uncommon. While this was the likely scenario, the doctor ordered a CT scan of my chest in case this was being caused by a blood clot in the lung, which can be very serious.

So pregnant nurse number two prepped me with an IV so that a contrast solution could be injected for clearer imaging. (Nurse number two unknowingly blew the vein.) I was then wheeled into the scanning room where I was laid onto my back, hands over my head, and a protective sheet was placed around my torso to protect my belly. Already unhappy in this position, especially since I am not supposed to be on my back when pregnant and could feel the pressure on my uterus, the radiology nurse noticed the defective IV. This nurse was also unsuccessful in his first attempt and moved to a location on my wrist. Success at last. I did my best to try to hold myself together but I began to feel heated and my blood pressure was rising. To make matters worse, the nurse announced that he would be asking me to hold by breath for several seconds during the scan even though I still couldn't breathe well. 

The actual scan didn't take more than a few minutes. On my second pass through, the nurse told me to hold breath (I did the best I could) and at the same time I felt heat go through my body from the chest to bladder from the solution. The scan was over, but I lost it and nearly gave Seth a heart attack when I was wheeled back into the patient room where he had been waiting. He thought I had already heard some bad news, but I was able to explain the traumatic experience between sobs.

The results came in about 30 minutes. They were negative, as I had expected. The doctor offered to give me something to help calm me, however the medication was classed where neither he nor I felt comfortable with taking since it could be harmful to the baby. So with information about anxiety/panic attacks, I was discharged with the recommendation to follow up at this weeks' appointment with my OB.

Seth and I both were exhausted when we got home. I was presently surprised to be able to fall asleep, now nearly 4:00 AM. 

Sunday was a tough day. I never felt the same kind of shortness of breath that I had felt in the night, however I still felt very emotional and shaken from the night's events. It didn't help being at church for my niece's baby dedication followed by attempting to be social at lunch with relatives and the reading of Mother's Day cards.

I could only hope this was the last time I had such an experience. Unfortunately this is not the case. So if you're reading, I would more than appreciate your prayers.